Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2012: jan : feb
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec

ill come over tonight and fix your vagina what printer fix your printer sorry autocorrect

11-30-11

come over tonight and fix

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some days i pull the tag on my shirt out so everyone walking by gets the urge to reach over and tuck it back in

11-29-11

shirt tag

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nope women find my cape alluring and mysterious

11-28-11

nope cape

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ugggghhh thats only going to be six hundred grand after tax god

11-27-11

lottery whiner

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no its not beeping at all are you sure youre 100% metal

11-26-11

one hundred percent metal

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suggestions

11-25-11

suggestion box

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why do i have to be the disciplinarian im going to my room

11-24-11

the disciplinarian

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we aint come from monkeys we was designed intelligently

11-23-11

on the third day he created the rascal

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this is your disciplinary write up for not smiling at work yesterday

11-22-11

disciplinary writeup

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did you really just text me to say dinners ready instead of walking ten feet

11-21-11

dinners ready

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i got really agile toes girl you wanna come over my place and watch me pick up socks with my feet

11-20-11

really agile toes

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its not a mess mom its a dam because im a beaver in my mind on the internet

11-19-11

its not a mess

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i love how you brush your teeth 8 times a day i love how you pick and pick and pick your skin

11-18-11

lets eat dinner symmetrically

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im just fine with gettin fucked from all angles you too good fer that

11-17-11

protest protestor

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rap names young yung lil micro nano pico

11-16-11

rap names

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stop trying to punish the rich we create a lot of shitty jobs

11-15-11

trying to punish the rich

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journey to the new world and then well give them snuggies full of smallpox

11-14-11

journey to the new world

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everyone who seems to like you is pretending

11-13-11

great fortune

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i watch the news too dad dont think i wont set myself on fire and replace you with someone from the military

11-12-11

the teenage arab spring

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no this is a double youd have a roommate in a room this big

11-11-11

dorm life

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no thanks i brought my lunch today and im gonna eat at my desk really loudly

11-10-11

brought my lunch today

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dont blame me my vote was electronically erased

11-09-11

dont blame me

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that aint even art at all paint a pumpkin like a football helmet and then yer talkin

11-08-11

aint even art

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a minute on the lips ten minutes on the butt lips

11-07-11

a minute on the lips

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happy birthday and remember 2 is the new 1

11-06-11

happy second birthday

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greatshow has been canceled in its place we bring you cra z teenz

11-05-11

canceled television shows

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scientists end the foreign wars cure the common cold and refuse to tell anyone how until the troops can come home

11-04-11

scientists end the foreign wars

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being a published author

11-03-11

being a published author

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dont but dad me you know the rules no talking unless your hulaing the talking hoop

11-02-11

dont but dad me

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if it wasnt for them labor unions an unskilled and uneducated guy like me could get a great job

11-01-11

them labor unions

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