Superpoop: 2014
Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
 

Toothpaste For Dinner comic: stretch arms * Text: 

After losing a significant amount of height, many patients complain of loose skin and stretch-arms.
12-31-07

stretch arms
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: just got home from work * Text: 

hi dad!! can we play a game


i just got home from work...ask me again in about a year
12-30-07

just got home from work
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: library closing * Text: 

the library's going to close unless it gets funding soon


oh no, that's too bad...i tried to help 'em stay open


how did you help?!


i take my books back late all the time
12-29-07

library closing
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: dogs with glasses * Text: 

DOGS WITH GLASSES


Now their sight...is better than their smell.


COMING SUMMER 2009
12-28-07

dogs with glasses
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: the best medicine * Text: 

i'm sorry you had a bad day at school, dude...just remember what your mom always says: xanax is the best medicine
12-27-07

the best medicine
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: field hockey * Text: 

i'm just not that big on field hockey...sorry dude
12-26-07

field hockey
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: mmorpg * Text: 

so, wait. you don't play ANY online role-playing games?


nope, and i won't until performing hundreds of hours of manual labor online will earn me real money
12-25-07

mmorpg
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: precocious kid xmas list * Text: 

well, yeah, i still like books and legos okay...but i don't think it's too crazy to throw
12-24-07

precocious kid xmas list
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: cincinnati delight * Text: 

i think i'm gonna order the cincinnati delight...what do you think?


no way, man...you should just get a bagel


well, what's the cincinnati delight?


a cop shoots you and all your belongings are stolen in the ensuing riot
12-23-07

cincinnati delight
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: does not include doctrine * Text: 

CHURCHBUS TM


INTELLIGENT DESIGN. CHRISTLIKE PRICES


starting at $31,900*


*does not include parishioners
12-22-07

does not include doctrine
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: wake up early * Text: 

WAKE UP EARLY!!


Don't you want to be sleepy and alone for the first couple hours of every day?
12-21-07

wake up early
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: supercomputer tired of this question * Text: 

hey, aren't you that supercomputer from
12-20-07

supercomputer tired of this question
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: tattoo meanings * Text: 

TATTOO MEANINGS


Teardrop: wearer has killed someone


Flowerpot: wearer has killed a potted plant


Twenty-sided die: wearer has killed a nerd
12-19-07

tattoo meanings
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: misplaced modifier * Text: 

craplist > lost and found > lost


2007.12.17 08:31:11pm


Misplaced my modifier. Up to $500 reward if placed next to the word it modifies
12-18-07

misplaced modifier
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: blogs become even less useful * Text: 

BLOG


MINI BLOG


SINGLE LETTERS SENT FROM MY PHONE


e


P


Q
12-17-07

blogs become even less useful
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: material balance equation * Text: 

MATERIAL BALANCE ANALYSIS (CARTOONIST)


aq. coffee extraction 0.049 g/s


advil 0.007 g/s


comics 2.0 units/day


hamburgers 0.136 g/s


blogs (unknown)


cartoonist 72 kg


not shown: bitterness (13% w/w)
12-16-07

material balance equation
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: do not eat silica gel * Text: 

well, yeah, it said
12-15-07

do not eat silica gel
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: book signing * Text: 

hey, thanks for signing your book...i liked reading it


thank you!


you know who else wrote a book? hitler
12-14-07

book signing
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: school bus safety * Text: 

SCHOOL BUS SAFETY GUIDELINES: 2011


beeep


- Arrive at least two hours early to bus stop for security check


- No bottled liquids or
12-13-07

school bus safety
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: china made everything in your house * Text: 

hey man, i like your sweatshirt...you know i made that, right?
12-12-07

china made everything in your house
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: clock out for the weekend * Text: 

and then, just as i was about to clock out for the weekend, i realized: it was only tuesday
12-11-07

clock out for the weekend
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: is your coworker a robot * Text: 

IS YOUR COWORKER A ROBOT?


I LOVE COLLEGE.


Warning signs:


- Never drinks coffee


- Can't stop going back to school


- Puts papers in your chair, not on your desk
12-10-07

is your coworker a robot
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: mercury in retrograde * Text: 

well, mercury's kind of been in retrograde for a while...i've been taking ginseng and burying chicken bones to counteract the astral chaos


this might sound crazy, but have you considered reading a science book and seeing a doctor?


oh, lord, no! doctors don't know anything!
12-09-07

mercury in retrograde
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: need cussed * Text: 

hey, i got a girlfriend...you need cussed out for anything?
12-08-07

need cussed
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: number one football fan * Text: 

FOOT BALL


FOOT FUCKIN' BALL


well, it looks like the office has its new number-one football fan
12-07-07

number one football fan
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: its the ambien walrus again * Text: 

hey, walrus...i think i took some ambien earlier. do you remember?


KILL YOUR PARENTS


okay, so i did...thanks
12-06-07

its the ambien walrus again
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: anxiety now available * Text: 

Do you...


- forget to turn your headlights off?


- leave the oven on?


- fail to automatically imagine the worst possible outcome to every scenario?


try...Anxiety TM
12-05-07

anxiety now available
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: restart your career * Text: 

hey, is the server down?


yeah, you're gonna have to restart your career - clean out your desk and then apply as an intern
12-04-07

restart your career
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: apples new washer * Text: 

APPLE'S NEW WASHER/DRYER
12-03-07

apples new washer
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: secret santa * Text: 

secret santa at the dentist's office: never fun


well, a mug full of toothbrushes! thanks again doctor dentist
12-02-07

secret santa
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Toothpaste For Dinner comic: i got robbed * Text: 

i got robbed fifteen minutes ago, what took you so long


sorry, we didn't know you were white
12-01-07

i got robbed
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Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec