Superpoop: 2014
Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2003: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2002: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
 

Toothpaste For Dinner comic: use keys to open doors * Text: 

drew needs food! drew is about to die!


DON'T SHOOT FOOD!!


as a pre-teen i thought it was hilarious to talk to people using video game quotes, until my dad yelled at me when i told him for the hundredth time as he got into his car,
08-31-04

use keys to open doors

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: departmental fattening * Text: 

DEPARTMENTAL FATTENING. n. the collective name used to refer to the constant stream of birthday cake, potlucks, retirement lunches, meeting donuts, and free pizza in a typical office


TO: all.employees@work.net


SUBJ: Cake in the break room at 10:30 today!
08-30-04

departmental fattening

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: fish heads fish heads * Text: 

eat them up, yumm............fish heads, fish heads, roly poly fish heads


have you ever wondered: is he/she
08-29-04

fish heads fish heads

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: autistic with food * Text: 

FUN FACT: i am slightly autistic, but only with food


for example, a couple of months ago i had some guacamole and it was good, and since then, i have eaten it two or three times a day
08-28-04

autistic with food

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: cargo shorts vs capri pants * Text: 

CARGO SHORTS VS. CAPRI PANTS


the final match in the 2004 world cup of clothes that make you look dumb
08-27-04

cargo shorts vs capri pants

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: wireless internet * Text: 

FREE WIRELESS INTERNET


because god knows you need to read the onion right now
08-26-04

wireless internet

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: four out of five doctors * Text: 

...in fact, four out of five doctors agree: SHUT UP
08-25-04

four out of five doctors

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: actual gas station conversation * Text: 

ACTUAL CONVERSATION I HEARD IN THE GAS STATION THE OTHER DAY


mom can i get a candy bar


okay...but if i get you a candy bar, that'll be your only snack for after dinner today
08-24-04

actual gas station conversation

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: view into my mind * Text: 

oh man, such excellent hard wood floors


VIEW INTO MY MIND: in 1993, everyone who saw that lisa loeb video where she walks through the empty apartment, but i fear i was the only one who enjoyed the apartment's high ceilings and beautiful hardwood floors more than lisa loeb's face or song
08-23-04

view into my mind

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: an urban legend * Text: 

so we took the kids to the park on sunday


oh, that's just an urban legend


whenever my coworkers tell me any kind of story, i like to dismiss it with
08-22-04

an urban legend

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: ikea life * Text: 

life is pretty much like ikea furniture: no matter how many times you read the instructions, it quickly comes to a short, brutal end
08-21-04

ikea life

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: what college professors want you to believe * Text: 

WHAT COLLEGE PROFESSORS WANT YOU TO BELIEVE HAPPENS


DREW!! we are in over our heads on this one! we're gonna lose this account unless you can do a triple integral in polar coordinates and show all work!!
08-20-04

what college professors want you to believe

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: dog section * Text: 

attention zoos:


you could make millions off me alone if you had a dog section in the zoo


clearly i am not the only one who would gladly pay the entrance fee if it meant i were guaranteed to see at least one boston terrier
08-19-04

dog section

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: my greatest regret * Text: 

my greatest regret is that i never filled entire notebooks with obsessive, paranoid writing and left them for my family to discover
08-18-04

my greatest regret

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: binary classification * Text: 

as words become increasingly popular and trickle down through social classes to children, they inevitably change to simply represent one half of the binary good/bad classification:


1981: awesome


1985: gay


1989: bad (i.e. good)


1992: sweet


2003: islamic


2006: downsized


2001: apocalyptic


aww man, my charles dickens rap action figure broke...totally downsized
08-17-04

binary classification

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: the smiths * Text: 

i just looked for a job and then i found a jooooob


i used to think the smiths were depressing but now i think they are pretty cheery and upbeat


that means either i am a happy person now, or i am so constantly depressed that it seems like morrissey is doing pretty well in most of his songs
08-16-04

the smiths

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: partisan discourse * Text: 

the level of partisan discourse on the internet is amazing


on any given day, thousands upon thousands of people log on to type either
08-15-04

partisan discourse

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: coworker drug stories * Text: 

then my finger was extending, like - reeeeeeeooooowwww, and it dipped into the whipped cream ten feet away and put it in my mouth


the only thing worse than going to work is going to work and listening to coworker drug stories
08-14-04

coworker drug stories

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: week end * Text: 

EXCERPT FROM
08-13-04

week end

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: krs one the mystery continues * Text: 

i have often wondered what happened to krs-one after the first track on rem's 1991 album
08-12-04

krs one the mystery continues

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: do you like me * Text: 

WARNING


do you like me, choose one


yes


no
08-11-04

do you like me

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: hobo snot * Text: 

son, the reasons you can't get a dog go beyond the fact that your mother will end up feeding him...it's...well...i'll put it this way: if i pay for a dog, i'm naming him, and won't it embarrass you to tell your friends your dog is named
08-10-04

hobo snot

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: my neighborhood * Text: 

my neighborhood is great - anytime i want, i can go out and find a pickup game of
08-09-04

my neighborhood

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: padded thing * Text: 

ALL NEW!!


a padded thing to sit on while you watch stadium sports!!


warning: padded thing will not alleviate the feeling that you're wasting your life watching steroid-laden men chase each other around in a field slapping each other on the butt
08-08-04

padded thing

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: judged not * Text: 

2004: finally, a world in which we are not judged by our color, but by the size of our sport utility vehicle
08-07-04

judged not

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: outlaw flash * Text: 

i am voting for whoever sponsors an initiative to outlaw flash


their running mate will be the one who outlaws the use of midi files on web pages
08-06-04

outlaw flash

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: office muzak hell * Text: 

NEW ADVENTURES IN OFFICE MUZAK HELL:


an all-MIDI instrumental version of
08-05-04

office muzak hell

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: whats for lunch * Text: 

what's for lunch today


soul-crushing melancholy followed by a long complacent torpor until i find relief in death


oh, sorry, i thought you said
08-04-04

whats for lunch

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: temp job rule number one * Text: 

TEMP JOB RULE #1:


you stuffed the papers i gave you to file into the sink and left the water running


oh, sorry, i'm just a temp


no matter what you do, you can excuse your behavior by simply saying
08-03-04

temp job rule number one

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:





Toothpaste For Dinner comic: circle yes or no * Text: 

i think the women of the world need to know that when i pass you a note that says
08-02-04

circle yes or no

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner comic: retarculous * Text: 

we're going to need you to re-code all of the database entries by hand


that's retarculous*


*retarded and ridiculous. canadian translation:
08-01-04

retarculous

Email this comic to:



talk about this on twitter!




Direct link to this comic:


Toothpaste For Dinner archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2005: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2004: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2003: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2002: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec